Last afternoon, our lecturer took us to the college library to show us journals which would help us with our year end projects. Though I claim to be a voracious reader, I would have stepped foot into the library not more than a couple of times for issuing a text book! I walked in with a quite but obvious bored look and went straight to the magazine section. My eyes instantly fell upon last month’s edition of Reader’s Digest. In fact last morning my mother was pushing me to subscribe for the magazine and I was more than willing to. Lovely read the magazine is.
The cover page article spoke of teens and porn, quite a sensitive issue to touch upon. But after reading the entire article it is more a serious issue and definitely not sensitive. It was disgusting to read that kids as young as 7 and 8 years, in the name of playing computer games were actually browsing porn websites and passing on their own pictures to friends of the other gender!
Reading on, kids have become so smart that some term it interest in the human body, some time pass and worse of it all porn becomes the definition of the ‘being cool’! The entire article spoke of the scenario in the USA, so most of us may not care less. It is a known fact that children there are allowed to be independent at a very young age where as in India; we’d be pampered to bits at the same age. Kids there get their cell phones when they are a mere 12 years and sometimes even lesser. I got my first cell phone when I was in class 11, that too after countless times of pleading, fighting and any other tactic I could lay my hands on!
While writing this, I was talking to one of my close friends and he said lot depends on parents and their ways of upbringing. It is silly to say that both parents are working so they have no time; they end up filling their children’s pockets with loads of money and buy them the latest models of phones so that they are in touch with each other. I know of many families where kids are extremely well-behaved in spite of their parents not being around most of the time. I am quite immune to one statement my mother constantly says: “God! Look at how that girl behaves and dresses! I wonder what sort of parents she has. They themselves must be like that!”
My mother on the contrary is extremely broad minded, though there are certain views and values which she stands by, like any one of us. Every time she makes such statements I’d fight back saying it was purely their personal lives and she should not be getting families and parents into it. But after some serious thought I realized some truth in it. When parents are out for almost 12-13 hours they hardly get 4-5 hours with their children and what much can one do in that time? These kids literally live with their friends where they pick up new behaviour, habits etc. If a watchful eye is not kept, you never know what is going on.
Coming back to the fact that the article mentioned above was with respect to USA, I have been witnessing a different sort of happening here. Since I love in Bangalore, I can’t generalize my statement saying it happens all over the country, but after reading this, people may nod heads of similar happenings.
I walk back home from college everyday at a time when most schools close for the day. All the high-end schools flaunt their huge buses dropping their students home. In such buses, the kids are hardly between class 3 and 5, 7 max. So they must be between 8 and 12 years, the same age as mentioned in the US article. When they pass by girls, young women, they pass obscene comments which we women generally hear from ‘Road-Romeos’ or older men! The kids used the four letter word with such ease, I was shell-shocked! See, once we are 17-18, it is quite natural for us to go through this process of learning things in college, watching stuff, friends relating their numerous experiences. Though we are vulnerable at that age too, I think it is a natural process. But at 7 or 12, it is way too young.
I don’t know if these kids picked it up from their browsing, friends but I suspect something else. Cab, van and auto drivers have always been criticized for their misbehaviour and vulgarity of sorts. Not a generalization but mostly this sort of behaviour is rampant today. The drivers are quite young and tend to influence the kids easily with their talks. I have seen many drivers giving access to their phones to the young students. So every time, I experience this sort of ‘harassment’ from the young ones, I try and take a peep at the speeding away driver. Would he teach his own little ones such things?
Day before, I went to watch a movie with my 3 young cousins. One just entering college, one in class 7 and the other 9. There was a scene where the couple was making out and for some strange reason I felt odd with the cousins around. I casually looked at them and they were at total ease, not batting an eyelid. I still remember I happened to watch ‘Titanic’ with my mother in the theatre and I was twisting and turning and looking everywhere else to avoid the scene and mom! Nothing wrong in the scene, but somehow my values would never let me watch stuff like that with my parents and family around.
When I watched those kids, I was feeling a generation apart. I am just 23 but it felt so far off! I am not even close to being a parent but these fears have already taken stride. Parents today, whether at home or are working must surely keep track before things go haywire. I am not a parent, so I would not know the practicalities but then choosing your maids, kid’s help, drivers etc is so important. Yes, you may not be able to constantly tab them but I am sure changing them periodically or getting someone who has been associated with the family for long may work out. These are just a few suggestions.
In another few years girls of my age will surely become mothers and I am dead sure that that generation will be far ahead! Scary?!! Wonder what sort of upbringing will we embark upon? I initially thought ill give those kids a piece of my mind but now I think otherwise. It is not his fault alone. Lot of other factors has contributed to it. The change has to come from somewhere. I am sincerely hoping this blog will be read by parents who can make the immediate change, parents-to-be who have a few years to go but at least introduce the infants and the growing ones to good things.
To conclude, I was reading this to my mom and she said, “That’s why I say kids from a young age must learn to be religious and listen to good things alone, be it any religion and customs they follow.” I smiled at her and welcomed her suggestion. Please feel free to comment or suggest anything regarding this! For those interested in the story I first mentioned, check our May’s edition of Reader’s Digest.
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